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Breaking Free

I’m following the steps outlined in Marie Kondo’s The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up and I’m finding that my thinking about possessions is changing as I go.

While letting things go is pretty easy for me, I am conscious of the value of the items I no longer need or want.

Finding value in my clutter is my biggest challenge.

Over the past few years as we’ve deliberately simplified, we’ve sold everything from outgrown baby clothes and books to electronics and furniture. We’ve gotten clutter out of our home and brought in some extra cash in the process. My frugal side loves bringing in money from selling our unwanted items!

I try to sell items that have a value greater than $5 and have successfully sold quite a few things via Facebook pages and Craigslist in the past couple of years.

However, it seems like we always have a ‘for sale’ pile somewhere in our home. And, our current ‘for sale’ pile has some items that have been in it for at least 6 months.

I donate items quite regularly but sometimes it’s hard to donate things that could potentially be sold and sometimes I feel guilty for just giving ‘valuable’ items to thrift stores.

Marie Kondo writes, ‘To get rid of what you no longer need is neither wasteful or shameful.’ How freeing this statement is for me. 

One of my biggest takeaways from ‘The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up’ has been breaking free of my guilt of giving away ‘valuable’ things.

And, as an avid thrifter, I am thankful that people donate nice, ‘valuable’ things (like my boys’ Georgia jerseys) so we can benefit from purchasing them and support a charity in the process.

Within in the past year, I’ve thrifted a smocked dress and a pair of Matilda Jane pants for Cecilia, a set of Duplos for my kids, a Marmot pullover for me and a Camelbak bottle, paying no more than $2 for any of those items.

My mindset has shifted from feeling guilty to being excited that someone is going to find our former possessions in a thrift store, find value in them and get a thrill from thrifting.

This change in thinking is getting things out of my house much faster and it’s so much easier than taking pictures, posting items for sell, storing them until they sell and arranging to meet up with a buyer once someone is interested.

Instead, I load items into bags and boxes, place them in my car and drop them off at The Salvation Army at my convenience.

During this season of life with 3 small children, it’s so much easier to donate. Yes, the extra money is nice when we do sell things but since we’re debt free (except our home) and living comfortably within our budget, it’s not necessary for us to sell everything that has some value.

Do you ever feel guilty about donating ‘valuable’ things? 

*In full honesty, I probably will still *try* to sell items that have a value of $10 plus but if they don’t sell within a week or two, I’ll just give to a friend or donate!

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Beginning Our KonMari Journey

First Week of KonMari

First Week of KonMari

With the The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up in hand, we started KonMari-ing our home last week.

We’re following along with the method so we worked on clothes and books during this week. Even though we already live simply, I was surprised with how much we were able to let go!

Clothes

This was my clothes and accessories pile, including my spring/summer clothes. This is not a shocking amount, I don’t own a lot of clothing but I picked up each item and asked if it sparked joy or not.

Decluttered Clothes

In the end, I was able to let this stack of clothes go. It’s not a huge pile but I really was surprised I was able to find this many items I really didn’t care for.

One of the things I let go was a purple pajama set. I purchased it to wear after Cecilia was born as a comfortable sleepwear/loungewear option. It is very comfortable but I never have loved it. I’ve been wearing it but feeling frumpy each time I wore it.  It felt great to let it go!

Folded Clothes

Here’s a glimpse into my casual, everyday clothes drawer. I love the way my shirts looked folded using the KonMari method of folding.

Spark Joy

During the middle of last week, I received a surprise package from my mother-in-law containing Marie Kondo’s Spark Joy. I was excited to receive this and have it accompany me through the rest of this journey. My favorite part of this book so far is the illustrated pictures showing how to fold various clothing items.

John David clothes

We spent last Friday working on my husband’s clothes. We were able to let this stack go.

I also went through all of our kids clothes. I went through all of the clothes in their drawers and closets as well as the clothes in their bins they have to grow in. I ended up with a decent pile of things that were outgrown, worn out, didn’t spark joy and we had too many of (I think Weston had about 20 t-shirts that should fit this spring in his bin…where does it come from!?) I’m handing down some of the items to friends with kids younger than mine and donating the rest.

Donations

This was the declutter pile hanging out in my room for a few days. I was glad to see it leave the house!

Declutter Stuff

And, here’s what we loaded up to drop off at Salvation Army last week. Not all of this was a result of this week’s KonMari-ing of our clothes and books. Most of it was clutter that I had boxed up that I was holding on to because I viewed it as ‘valuable’, thinking I might try to sell it or at least put it in a yard sale sometime.

Just looking at those boxes that were taking up space in my home was mentally draining. I decided the space they would free up in our home and in my mind was worth just donating them. And, I was right. It felt great to drop off this load and our home seems so much more open with all of this stuff out of our home.

All in all, week one was a success! I doubt the following weeks will see this large of an amount of stuff leaving but who knows.

If you KonMari-ed your home, did you think going through clothing and books was the easiest part? 

Beginning Our KonMari Journey

Over the next few weeks, I’ll be posting about our progress as I’m reading through ‘The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up’ and sharing some of the things I’m learning along the way.

Here’s our story about our path towards a life of simplicity and minimalism so you have an understanding of where we are at the beginning of our KonMari journey.

We’ve been simplifying for what seems like our entire marriage. Our first home was a tiny 572 square foot apartment and the possessions we each owned coupled with wedding presents more than filled up that space. (And there were still items left in our parents homes.)

After 2 moves, only 7 months apart in 2008, I realized how much I really wanted to simplify. Packing up all of your possessions and putting them into a moving truck makes you realize just how much stuff you own.

I started really decluttering in 2009, trying to weed out as many items as I could that weren’t useful. In August 2009, I found out I was pregnant! I was determined to keep things simple for our baby. In fact, we only purchased one item, an outfit the day we found out we were expecting a boy. Everything else, from our crib to our changing table, to bedding, books and toys was either handed down or given to us as gifts for baby. We were so blessed by generous people but also a bit overwhelmed with how much stuff our 8.5 pound baby brought into our home by the time he arrived in April 2010.

In September 2010, my husband accepted a new position in Georgia and we were once again loading up a moving truck. Again, I was astounded and even a bit embarrassed with the amount of stuff we owned. We moved our little family into a 3 bedroom condo with a single car garage and we filled it up. The closet in the extra bedroom was full of stuff and so was the garage. In the 6 months that we lived there, we never were able to park our vehicle in the garage.

When we purchased our home in March 2011, we actually downsized (our first home and condo both were around 1,500 square feet). Our new home was 1,300 square feet. While it didn’t have an attached garage or basement, it did have a detached garage so there was ample space to store stuff.

In the almost 5 years that we’ve lived in this home, we’ve added 2 more children to our family. In that time, we really have simplified our home, changed our consumption habits and live quite minimally.

My husband has adopted a simple ‘uniform’ consisting mainly of jeans, black button ups and t-shirts. I don’t own many clothes or shoes, neither do our children. Our kitchen is small, therefore we keep our dishes and kitchen gadgets very simple. And, our children really don’t have an overabundance of toysBut, there’s still a lot of stuff in our home and some of it is never used, played with, worn or read. 

Trying to live without a lot of clutter can be quite challenging for 5 people in 1,300 square feet . We’re choosing to live in our ‘small’ home because it makes the most sense for our family financially but we don’t want to feel cramped in our home. Living with less stuff makes our home feel like there’s more than enough space for the 5 of us. 

After Christmas, (and the influx of stuff that comes with this holiday), our home was in need of major decluttering.

Instead of decluttering how I typically do, I decided that we’re going to try following the KonMari Method. I read ‘The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up’ last year, nodding my head in agreement with most of her decluttering and tidying philosophy and even adopted the KonMari way of folding. However, I didn’t actually follow the method in terms of going through our belongings category by category and only keeping those items that ‘spark joy’ or those that are necessary.

We’re beginning our KonMari journey now and hope to simplify our home and only surround ourselves with the things we love or absolutely need.

I’ll be posting about things I’m learning and what’s leaving my home in the weeks ahead!

Have you read ‘The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up’? Have you followed the KonMari Method? 

*I do not agree with all of her writing and philosophy. However, there’s a lot of good content in the book and I just take what’s helpful and ignore the religious parts I disagree with.

Our Temporary Chaos

Our life has been a bit chaotic this past month.

We started the first phase of our home renovation on August 22. (And, when I say we, I really mean my husband, my role in all of this is to serve as the cleaning crew and do some painting!)

We put in a wall between our kitchen and hallway, are replacing floors in the hall, kitchen and dining area, plan to take down a partial wall in the kitchen, rearrange our cabinets, put in a gas oven and redo the backsplash.

We’re over a month in and it’s just been a hall renovation so far. We’ve ripped out the tile in the hall. Doing that caused us to find that at some point our return air unit had leaked so there was moisture in the sub floor. This caused the flooring to temporarily come to a halt and we had to bring in an HVAC professional. We’re thankful it doesn’t have to be entirely replaced but it’s currently sitting in our carport, waiting to be re-installed.

Cecilia's Room

Our home has been a bit unsettled these past few weeks. Cecilia’s room holds the entire contents of one of the hall closets and other things from the other two smaller ones. We also have some of the new hardwood flooring in her room and a box of miscellaneous home improvement items.

Hall

Our hall is half painted, mostly floored and we’ve been shuffling tools and other flooring items around in the hall.

Bathroom

The bathroom that is right off of the hall is serving as extra storage space.

Carport

Now, add to this chaos a carport that is half full of flooring, sub flooring, some ripped out tile and a table saw.

Yard Sale Stuff

The other half of the carport contains yard sale items. I’ve been decluttering like crazy over the past couple of months and have decided to have a yard sale so our boys can raise money for a giving initiative at our church. Plus, our boys typically park their bikes in the carport so we’ve literally had to cut out a path just to get to our vehicles some days.

Backyard

Our riding mower is in the shop and our push mower is currently needing repair so our yard looks like a hayfield. (The picture doesn’t look so bad but trust me, it’s tall!)

And, to top all of this off, my husband was sick ALL weekend Friday-Monday. Really sick. He attempted to do some flooring Friday afternoon which I’m convinced made everything worse. And, let’s be honest, lawn mower repair and flooring fall entirely on him because I lack those skills.

So, things are currently quite messy, cluttered and the yard looks awful.

However, I am at peace with the current situation because I know it’s temporary.

This is a huge step for me. My natural bent is perfectionism. In the past, tall grass, a carport full of junk and a house in the midst of home renovation would have made me miserable and absolutely unpleasant to be around.

While I have to admit, most of it is visually unsettling to me (clutter/chaos causes me to feel a bit stressed), I am able to move beyond my feelings in regards to the mess. In those moments it starts to bother me, I remember that a home renovation is a temporary time of chaos, we’re having a yard sale this Saturday and what doesn’t sell will immediately be donated and we soon shall have our mower back and the grass will be cut.

This past Sunday, our pastor talked over some current bad cultural lessons and one of those lessons we believe is that life is a performance.

My perfectionism has been driven by this.

I was trying to please and be found worthy by being perfect. As an adult, it shifted from grades and extracurricular performance to trying to keep my home and yard perfect and appear to have things all together.

Thankfully, the desire to perform has been identified and no longer drives me.

Perfect doesn’t exist. Life is messy, life is cluttered, life is imperfect.

And, while it may be hazardous (ha, ha) to have anyone in our home during this season of temporary chaos, I’m not embarrassed by what anyone may think of the mess and disorder that is currently our home.

Don’t be so caught up in trying to perform and be found worthy that you live your life for other people. Life is not a performance.